Focus on the Family Community: Relationships and Marriage ...

Where to begin.... Like all stories start in the beginning, let's start there. I met my wife about 2 years ago, but of course she wasn't my wife then. I was married but living separately away from my then current wife. I was a Christian but not following in HIS word. I had turned away from God and lived life how I wanted....not how He wanted me too. Anyway's.. I met this absolutely beautiful woman and we starting dating. I was in the process of getting a divorce and told the woman I had been dating that. She said she understood and wanted to continue the relationship anyway. She was a follower in Christ and stated the only way that this relationship was going to work was if we both was in HIS word and following HIM. I had been feeling God tug on my heart for a long time, and rededicated my life to HIM. We started dating exclusively and became very serious. My divorce went through and felt that I had a new chance at a renewed marriage with God at the helm. I moved into her house, but slept in a separate bed because we did not want to smear our relationship with God with sex.

???? I invited her to a wedding celebration for my nephew shortly after moving into her house, and she agreed to go with me and my daughter. The wedding went well and we all went to the reception and she started to notice things about my family that she didn't like. After my mother had left the reception, my sister came up to my girlfriend and was upset that I had started to change and now follow Christ and that she was to blame. I wanted to leave right then and there, but my girlfriend wanted to talk to my sister and try to calm her down. It was then that my sister compared her to my ex-wife and said she was younger looking and prettier than her. This devasted my girlfriend and we left the party. At home she asked my daughter if it was true if my ex-wife was younger looking and prettier than her and she agreed with my sister. She then asked me if it was true, and I said she is younger looking, but you are definitely prettier than her. This again devasted her. Fast forward about a year and we are engaged to get married and she had since forgiven me for the comment. My daughter has not made it easy for me to be in this relationship with her. She has manipulated and lied to my wife and told her she was jealous of her. One evening we got into an argument about my daughter and I defended my daughter from my my fiance. That enraged her and in my anger I made a comment about how she looked better in pictures then in real life.

???? She again forgave me for the comment and we get married. Since the marriage we have stopped going to church, she doesn't believe that we have to go to church to worship God. She drinks on a regular basis, and curses a lot as well. She also has anger issues, but she also suffers from a mental illness. She still says she believes in God and loves him, but doesn't want to be seen in church because of my comments about her face. She has slowly eroded to a shell and blames it all on me because of my comment about her face. She has kicked me out of her house, but let me back in to work it out. She says she is now repulsed by me or my touch and has denied any kind of intimacy. She said it is going to take years for her to trust me again or have those feelings for me. She is also obsessed about her face now and spends hours at the mirror and won't even let me look at her, because I compared her to my ex-wife. I acknowledge what I said was wrong, and have repented and asked forgiveness for it, She continues to bring it up everyday and makes me aware that I messed this marriage up. I have gone into a depression since and try to put on a brave face for everyone, but it is extremely difficult to be motivated. She says my comments are the same as infidelity and feels I have betrayed her. I believe that God has a purpose for me, and that He lets things happen so we can draw nearer to Him. When He strips everything we have and we are left with nothing, I know He wants us to turn to Him... I'm just having a hard time with it.... Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

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